True Tales of Dad #1

Let's take a break from the God Ana[b]log for a minute. I wanna tell you a story.

When I was a kid, for some goddamned reason, I was under the genuine impression that if there was a band name that wasn't BLATANTLY OBVIOUS that it *was* a "band name" (The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, etc), I assumed it was the lead vocalist's namesake. I would think "David Bowie! Okay. Alice Cooper. Well, this is pretty clear" and so on.

Now, this had it's limits: I didn't think that Ozzy's name was "Black Sabbath," for example. But there were others that, to any normal brain, perhaps, ARE obvious. Personally, I am going to blame bands like Jethro Tull, Molly Hatchet and such for the following embarrassment.

Once, my father and I were doing something in the livingroom. I don't remember what it was, specifically, although I do remember it had to do with a bookshelf. Anyway, my dad, being a music fan, had "Breaking The Law" on, nice and loud. When the song ended, I exclaimed:

"Judas is a great singer!"

He understood what I meant, and carefully informed me that the gentleman in question is actually named Rob, and that Judas Priest is merely the band name. "Bands aren't always named after the singer." he told me.

I, for the life of me, couldn't understand why you would name a band a name that wasn't the name of someone in the band! I was actually shocked to find out that there was no one named Floyd in Pink Floyd. There was no one named Lizzy in Thin Lizzy.

"Immigrant Song" began thunder out of the speakers as I muttered "Oh..."

Then, to my shame, I asked:

"So... Led Zep--"

"No, son." he cut me off, with a (surely disappointed) shake of his head.

We never talked about this again.

Thank fuck.

- Adam